A unique experience that a Dominant can undergo during a session of D/s is Dom Space. This generally occurs during a very intense session between a Dominant and the submissive. The submissive finds her sub space and blocks all thoughts out of her mind except for her Master and his wishes. The Dominant finds his Dom Space to focus his mind totally on the D/s session and his submissive.
The first time I experienced this feeling of Dom Space, I was a bit overwhelmed. I was in a session with my submissive giving her an intense whipping. I had started out with soft whips with a continuous progression of them being harder. With the intensity of the whipping increasing I felt warmness sweeping over my body and a dissociation with the world around me. At the time I didn't totally understand this feeling, but could feel the desire to whip my submissive as hard and as uncontrollably as I could. All I could see at this point was myself, the whip and my submissive tied to the bed. I was able to keep the whipping within control, but felt a very strong desire to loose control with it.
At the time I didn't understand what had overwhelmed me. I did know that I wanted to achieve that feeling again. I found in future sessions with my submissive that it became natural for me to hit the plateau of Dom space. I found that I was more focused in our sessions and remained extremely aware of the sub space that my submissive was in, her breathing intensified, her responses to my commands, the way her body responded to the whip. Seeing the marks on her body, appeared to increase my desire more. At the same time everything around me had become unfocused. It was if we had entered our own world.
Being the type of person that needs to understand things about myself, I wanted to understand this feeling more. I first looked at what sub space was and tried to get an understanding of it. Then I related my experience with Dom Space to sub space looking for similarities and differences. They both have a common thread of focusing both into the session. Differences can include what triggers each into their space, perception of each other during the session and feelings afterwards.
Normally the Dom triggers a submissive into her space, from certain commands or actions he may take, where as a Dom is triggered more by his feelings and the reactions from his submissive. An example would be when I order my submissive to her knees, my fingers roughly seizing her hair, jerking her head back and looking deep into her eyes. The submissive would find herself slipping into sub space from the Dom doing this, but the Dom found his space from the actions of doing it and her responses. Same action can send both into their own space. Usually the more intense the command or action the deeper into space each will go.
While the Dom and the sub are in their spaces during the session, both are experiencing different sensations. The Dom is becoming stronger while the submissive is becoming weaker. He becomes very aware of her state of submission and virtually feeds on her weakening state. He is very aware of her breathing, reactions to him, and the depth of her submission. During this time the Dom is observant of his sub going into her space and the depth of it, but the sub is not aware of the space her Dom has found. It is almost as if the Dom is drawing strength from his submissive and becoming more powerful from it. The peak of this can be a very dangerous point. Generally at the peak of the D/s session the submissive has become so weak she cannot speak, she cannot react and there is nothing she can do to stop what her Dom is doing at this point. While the submissive has become totally helpless, the Dom has become totally animalistic with no inhibitions. The Dom must realize that this is happening and not let himself
go over the edge. Personally this is the point that I enjoy the most, allowing the savage in me to surface, but still keeping it within boundaries.
After they have completed the session and both are coming down out of their space, both are feeling different sensations. The Dom, holding his submissive in his arms, is needing to show his love after his actions. The submissive, needing to feel her Dom's love, craves to be held tightly in his arms. I have found that I usually feel very strong at this point, while my
submissive feels very weak. But both are needing the love and reassurance of the other.
There are also many different levels of the space that each can achieve. It takes each to have their space to really achieve a D/s relationship. The depth of each of their spaces will grow as the bond grows. They will start small with the giving of the submissive and taking by the Dominant, until both are pushing the very boundaries of what they have to give and take within the D/s session. It takes total trust in the submissive to totally give all of herself and to separate her mind from her body. The Dom must understand this and know how to control it, because within his space also comes allowing the savage in him to appear.
These feelings that I have discussed are from my own personal experiences. Not everyone's feelings are the same during this, but all do share the common ground of a Dom growing stronger and the submissive growing weaker. I also know how it helped me grow within my domination from experiencing Dom space. I feel now that I have looked at the savage beast within me and have learned to control it.
© 1999 Master Fire
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